Marriage & Family Therapist MFC 43846
Image Courtesy E. Gibbons
Men in their 20s and 30s are reporting “copulatory impotence,” which is the inability to maintain an erection with an in-person sexual partner. These men report they still objectively find their partner attractive, but need to fantasize porn-like scenarios to get or maintain an erection.
The abundance of Viagra and Cialis commercials portrays erectile dysfunction as a normal, common phenomenon. Not, however, for men under 40! It’s often the porn!
We talk a lot in treatment about compulsive behaviors functioning as self-soothing mechanisms. In the 5-Day Intensive Outpatient Program, we often construct a genogram of each participant’s family history. Invariably, someone will say “Yeah, whatever. I don’t want to waste time blaming my parents for my being a sex addict.”
It’s always tough at this juncture. As clinicians, we want clients to accept responsibility for choices made. Yet we also want to present some explanations (not justifications and not excuses!) for how these coping mechanisms might have come into being: What emotionally dysregulating material is present, and how does sexually compulsive behavior obliterate those intolerable feelings?
Recent findings in epigenetics are fascinating to those of us working in the addiction field. [Read more…]
Image Courtesy James Niland
Here’s a excellent article about the effects of betrayal from the New York Times. It’s a very elegant articulation of the depth and breadth of disorientation experienced by partners of sex addicts.
Image Courtesy J E Theriot
Take this short quiz to determine whether your sexual behaviors involve the components of tolerance, escalation and negative consequences we associate with sex “addiction.”
1. Do you engage in sexual behaviors to a greater extent, or over a longer period of time, than you intended?
2. Have you had more than one unsuccessful effort to reduce or control your sexual behavior?
3. Is significant time lost preparing for, acting-out, and/or recovering from your sexual behavior?
[Read more…]
Image courtesy Mateus Záccero
The American Society of Addiction Medicine (ASAM) issued a statement that addictions are the result of biochemical changes in the brain. Whether the addictive behavior involves alcohol, drugs, gambling, or sex—there’s an altered brain chemistry at work.
According to Dr. Michael Miller, past president of ASAM who oversaw the development of this new addiction definition, “the disease is about brains, not drugs. It’s about underlying neurology, not outward actions.”